


Villanelle's Philosophy of Action

by blisters



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F, This is so dumb oh my god
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-15
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-03-05 19:03:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18834814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blisters/pseuds/blisters
Summary: ‘I’m sorry I’m not very creative.’ She held Eve’s hand in place and dropped her voice. ‘I don’t have a strong imagination, actually. I know that I can seduce you, but I can never quite picture how. I think that’s why you’re so fascinating to me.’ Eve was silent, but her breath had quickened and her grip tightened against Villanelle. Villanelle brushed her cheek against Eve’s, and whispered: ‘is this the difference between knowing-that, and knowing-how?’Eve gave a laugh like a hiccup into Villanelle’s neck. ‘Gilbert Ryle can bite me.’‘Tell him to get in line.’Philosophy Joeks AU because I'm trash and Aaron Peele should be bullied in every possible world.





	1. The Perfect Being

‘Oksana.’

Villanelle hated that name, and Aaron Peele knew it, but he still used it. It was a subtle form of disrespect, meant to remind her that no matter how smart she was, he was still the one grading her papers. She would not be treated as an equal.

Not that this was unusual. Even Professor Leonova treated her as a precocious but willful child. Villanelle had given her preferred name during introductions on the first day of class, and had been cautiously optimistic when Anna referred to it during her lecture on proper names.

‘As silly as it may seem, the semantics of proper names has been one of the most studied areas in philosophy of language over the past several hundred years. It seems like a simple thing; if I ask any of you what a word like ’dog’ means, you’ll probably be able to give me an answer. But what about the meaning of “Anna Leonova”? My name used to be “Anna Aanmokoba”, before I got married, and if somebody used that name I would know they were talking about me. So those two names both designate me, but do they have the exact same meaning? There’s one school of thought that would say yes. This began with, or at least was inspired by, John Stuart Mill, and we’ll read him on connotation versus denotation next week. But the modern version of the idea is just that the meaning of a proper name is nothing more than the thing it designates. The meaning of “Anna Leonova” is me, the physical person.

‘Now there are a few problems with that idea. This actually happened to me: I had a friend growing up who I fell out of touch with for a very long time, and we happened to meet again recently. Twenty years ago she knew Anna Aanmokoba, but when she met Anna Leonova she didn’t recognize me as her friend from childhood. So she knew the meaning of both names, but didn’t realize they belonged to the same person. Mill’s theory says that the meaning just is the person, so my friend’s confusion should be impossible.

‘I would be surprised if any of you knew my maiden name before today,’ here she glanced at Villanelle for a moment, ‘but now that you do, you know that both Annas are the same person. So it seems like you know something more than my friend did. So maybe there’s some part of the meaning of one of my names that you know and she didn’t.’

A student raised her had.

‘Yes?’

‘Are the names also different because now it wouldn’t be appropriate to call you by your maiden name? I mean, it would be rude, like the person doesn’t recognize your marriage.’

Anna looked at Villanelle again, but it’s possible nobody else noticed the professor’s blush as she turned away to answer the question.

“Yes, there’s that social aspect to names as well. Some names are appropriate in certain times and places but not others. And it might be highly disrespectful to use a name in the wrong context. Think about how meaningful it is for someone who is transgender to choose a new name, and how harmful it is to continue to use their old name. There’s pretty obviously a lot of meaning, and history, to names, over and above the person they designate.”

And yet Anna still didn’t call her Villanelle.

* * *

‘Oksana!’

‘What?’

‘Have you been paying attention?’

Villanelle looked up at Peele, still typing on her phone. ‘Yes.’

Peele flushed. ‘What, then, is the basic problem with the ontological argument as we’ve formulated it?’

She was texting Eve, the one person among all the instructors who did call her Villanelle. She pointedly placed her phone on the table and looked at Aaron.

‘Pardon?’

‘I said,’ clearly exasperated now, ‘what is the problem with –’

‘It assumes the antecedent.’

He glared at her. ‘So you were listening. Put away your phone.’ She didn’t, of course.

Peele took a breath and turned away from Villanelle. ‘Our modern formulation of the ontological argument is that existence is a perfection. So if there is a perfect being, then it exists. But this is a conditional; the overall proposition is only true if the antecedent is true. Namely, that there is a perfect being. But to say that there is a perfect being is begging the question, since that’s what we’re trying to prove with the ontological argument.’

Villanelle was typing again. _I’m literally dying._ Eve replied immediately. _He’ll be mad for days if you use literally like that in front of him._

‘Do you have anything to add, Oksana?’ Villanelle look up to see Peele glaring again. ‘I’d hate to think we’re boring you here.’

‘I’m extremely bored, Aaron, thank you.’

‘First off,’ his voice was finally rising. ‘I have asked you all to call me Mr. Peele.’ Villanelle pointedly rolled her eyes. ‘Second, if you find metaphysics tedious then perhaps this is not the class for you, Oksana.’

Under the table, Villanelle called Eve, then wrapped her earbuds in her scarf, to muffle any sound. Then she smiled sweetly at Peele. ‘I have to complete my group requirements, Aaron. And your sister asked me to take this class so she’d have someone to study with.’ Amber blushed wildly and looked away. ‘Anyway,’ she continued, ‘I think I have kept up with the coursework? I’m not sure what cause you have to complain about me being here.’

‘I have cause to complain when you disrupt my class, as you are doing right now.’

‘Excuse me, Aaron, but you were the one who asked me if I was bored.’ Her smile tightened. ‘Did you feel you weren’t getting enough attention? I know how much you like your undergrads.’

Peele reddened in the deepening silence. ‘Oksana, you’re treading on very thin ice here.’

‘Is that why you have to teach the most boring classes? Are you not allowed to teach ethics, because you sleep with your students?’ Several students gasped and the color rushed down Peele’s neck as he stood up. ‘Leave my classroom. I will be discussing your behavior with the Chair.’

Villanelle rose, but didn’t leave. ‘Don’t get me wrong, Aaron. I often find ethics very boring as well. You talk and talk about how you should be better, or nicer, then go and do exactly the same thing as before. It’s just masturbation, isn’t it? Nobody actually acts on their principles.’ She picked up her textbook, and walked to the front of the class. ‘Ethics should be about action, don’t you agree?’

Phone against her ear, Eve heard a crack beneath the static, then Aaron Peele’s voice: _‘My nose is bleeding!’_


	2. Bad Behavior(ism)

Amber caught up with Villanelle after her brother furiously dismissed class. ‘Oh my god, Villanelle.’

‘He was so rude! What was I supposed to do?’

Amber laughed nervously. ‘No, I know he was being an asshole. I’m not going to defend him, but –’ She put a hand on Villanelle’s arm to slow her. ‘He doesn’t – I mean – has he really slept with his students before?’

‘Yeah. Loads of times.’ Amber dropped her hand and stopped walking.

Villanelle turned back and stood in front of Amber, looking down at her. ‘What? Would you rather I tell you he’s a great guy who respects women?’

‘What? No, it’s just – it’s a lot to take in, OK? He’s my brother.’

Villanelle let herself soften and embraced Amber. ‘You’re right. I’m sorry.’ Then she saw Eve approaching, and gently rubbed Amber’s back.

Eve stopped when she saw Villanelle hugging the other girl. Then Villanelle caught her eye and grinned, and Eve knew she would interpret Eve’s hesitation in exactly the wrong way. Then Eve wondered why she had stopped dead in the first place, then wondered when she had started overthinking things like this, and started walking again.

‘Hello, Villanelle.’

Villanelle smiled brightly and let go of Amber. ‘Hello, Eve!’

Eve tried not to smile back. ‘Could I speak with you for a moment?’

Amber looked uncertainly between them. ‘Is this about my brother?’

Eve managed to look believably nonplussed. ‘No, this has nothing to do with Aaron.’

Villanelle placed a reassuring hand on Amber’s shoulder. ‘So what’s going on?’

Eve’s eyes followed Villanelle’s hand for a moment too long before snapping back. ‘Let’s go to my office.’

Amber frowned. ‘I thought you weren’t teaching this semester. Villanelle said you were working on your dissertation.’

‘Yes, that’s right.’

The silence rippled briefly before Villanelle leaned into Amber’s shoulder, grinning again, and gave a stage whisper. ‘I think I’m in trouble.’ Then she quickly stepped away. ‘Bye, Amber!’ Eve gave Amber a tight smile, then turned and followed Villanelle.

* * *

Eve shared her office with two other graduate students. Fortunately for Villanelle, neither Hugo or Jess were present.

Eve sat at her desk and turned to look at Villanelle. ‘I’m not going to say that wasn’t …’

Villanelle took a seat on the desk. ‘Very funny?’

Eve failed to repress a smile. ‘He will go to the Chair, you know. And Carolyn is still pissed about the Diogenes – roleplay – thing.’ Villanelle was proud of that one. ‘Did you buy a fake beard just for that?’

‘No, last year I dressed up as my high school counselor for his birthday.’

‘What?’

‘I’m very grateful to Mr. Vasiliev. If it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t have come here, and I wouldn’t have met you.’ Villanelle slid off the desk and moved to stand over Eve.

‘Villanelle…’ Eve’s tone wavered somewhere between warning and plea.

‘I know you’re grateful too, Eve.’ Her hand was moving gently through Eve’s hair. Eve always reminded her of Anna, but without the maternal condescension. And with even better hair.

Eve had closed her eyes, but now she looked coldly at Villanelle. ‘That whole speech to Aaron, and now you want me to sleep with you?’

‘I’m not your student anymore.’ Closer, straddling Eve’s legs. ‘And there’s nothing going on between me and Amber, if that’s what you’re thinking.’ Eve blushed. Villanelle knew her jealousy before Eve knew it herself.

Eve pushed her chair back and stood up. ‘That’s enough. Someone might come in.’ Villanelle’s smile dragged Eve’s eyes back to her, before regaining control.

‘No, they won’t.’ Forward and back, and now Eve leaned against the wall, as if to catch her breath.

‘How do you know?’

The smile twitched into a grin. ‘You were the one who taught me that assertions of knowledge depend on the stakes. She leaned into Eve, into her hair. ’And the stakes are very high right now. It’s very important that I kiss you, Eve.’

Eve was laughing, but her color stayed and a hand was on Villanelle’s waist. ‘That’s the worst line you’ve come up with yet. And that’s not how Contextualism works.’

‘I’m sorry I’m not very creative.’ She held Eve’s hand in place and dropped her voice. ‘I don’t have a strong imagination, actually. I know that I can seduce you, but I can never quite picture how. I think that’s why you’re so fascinating to me.’ Eve was silent, but her breath had quickened and her grip tightened against Villanelle. Villanelle brushed her cheek against Eve’s, and whispered: ‘is this the difference between knowing-that, and knowing-how?’

Eve gave a laugh like a hiccup into Villanelle’s neck. ‘Gilbert Ryle can bite me.’

‘Tell him to get in line.’

The kiss came sudden, and pulled on Eve’s lower lip so that she gasped. Then the door opened and Professor Martens was there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmmmmmmmmmmmm


End file.
